I’m sitting here minding my own business, when I see this:
Huh. Who might you be?
“Me? Oh, I’m just a nice little figment of your imagination, brought about by an overly busy day. Consider me your point of de-stress.”
You? You’re my point of de-stress? You seem very sure of yourself for someone I’ve just met. You certain about that?
“Oh yes.”
Is that…a cheesy grin? What have you got to be grinning about, might I ask?!
Yup. I even have…
A mustache. Seriously.
“Well, I’m in love.”
In love. My imaginary figment is in love.
“Yup. His name is Juan.”
One?
“No, Juan. You’ve met him.”
I have.
Yup.
Oh good Lord…
“We’re very happy together.”
I can see that. Is that a hipster scarf?!
“He’s very on trend.”
I wouldn’t be sure about that, hipsters aren’t hip any more.
“That might explain why his sister thinks he’s naff.”
His sister?
Oh sweet Jesus.
“You okay?”
I take it, so, she’s not a fan of your relationship.
“Not really, she doesn’t believe in same hand relationships.”
…
And what do the rest of your family think?
Oh they just adoooore him!
Our heroine slams down the laptop cover, resolves to not eat any more cheese late at night, and goes to bed….